i forget sometimes that young kids don't know how to treat others. in coaching 9-11 year old girls, i am remembering real quick what it's like when a kid gets jealous. they do everything in their power to turn their jealousy into anger and hate. kids are so mean to one another. on the flip side, i also forget when you're 11, it's not so easy to just suck it up and work harder.

example: Sally is jealous Jane is a better basketball player. Sally says mean things about Jane to everyone else around them. Instead of Sally working harder to become better, she spends her time getting worse and not paying attention. And Jane spends her time holding back and trying to not stand out by being good, thus letting Sally win.

I am trying to teach the "Jane" on my team to work even harder and get even better and in the long run, nothing "Sally" can say or do can change who she is. i hate to see kids struggle in social settings. i hate kids like "sally" always getting to win. but how do you teach an 11 year old the ole 'sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me' isn't just some ridiculous saying, but in fact somewhat true. they can only hurt you if you let them.

i don't want to be 11 again...

now my problem as a coach is i know this is going on but how do i solve it? do i involve parents? there are three girls that have mentioned the said "sally"'s behavior and i thought it was getting better until a tearfilly breakdown after practice. i confronted a girl for not trying in practice and she told me it was due to "sally's" comments to her friends. i feel this problem is getting out of control and i don't want to make "jane's" life miserable outside of practice, which i am thinking involving parents might do, but i also thing said parents are blind to their daughters attitude and lack of social skills.

I JUST WANT TO TEACH THE GAME OF BASKETBALL!!